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Neo-Stoics and Weird French Cookies
November 2010 by Somebody

OK, I admit the new Junk Closet section doesn't look that great, but keep in mind that it's still in the process of being conceived. I don't think romantic music and a candlelight dinner are going to speed up the process much, so cool your jets out there. I'm going to try to class it up a little bit with some animated gifs, flashing banner ads, funny cat pictures, and maybe some sports bloopers. And for those of you hungry for more of our fabulous reading material, the Junk Closet will eventually have a column called Neo-Stoics Lounge, which will be dedicated to philosophical, anthropological, and semi-scientific musings.

"What's a Neo-Stoic?" you might be asking. Well, Stoicism is a form of Post-Classical Greek philosophy that I learned about in a Western Civilization class I had a couple of decades ago. The Stoics were known to favor reason over the emotions, and prided themselves on being able to withstand adversity without getting bent out of shape. I also learned about the Cynics, the Skeptics, and the Epicureans. I shared this newfound information with my future colleague Somebody Else, and we conspired to form a new school of thought known as Neo-Stoicism. Unfortunately, we never hashed out any details about what the new philosophy meant. My guess is that it has something to do with Stoicism, but with some kind of wacky, irreverent twist. Our dubious concept, forgotten for over 20 years, has now been dusted off and utilized as the name of the upcoming column, Neo-Stoics Lounge.

I'm also pleased to announce that the Music Desk page now features a YouTube video. See, we're no dummies. We know how much you love to watch videos and just can't resist clicking those play buttons whenever you see them. So, why should you come to our site to watch videos when you can just go to YouTube and watch them? Because on our site, you'll get to see the cream of the crop of music videos as chosen by our knowledgeable staff. You'll also get to see some of our own homemade music videos, created by the same powerful brains that brought you this visionary website.

You probably don't pay much attention to the advertisements around here, but there was a particular Google ad that appeared frequently on several of our webpages for a website called Groupon.com, which offers internet coupons from various businesses. The ad in question shows a photo (seen above) of several hamburger-shaped objects, in various unnaturally bright colors, arranged on a plate. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what these things were, but a little bit of research has cleared up the mystery. It's apparently a kind of French cookie called a macaron, not to be confused with the lowly coconut macaroon. According to one commenter on Yahoo! Answers, "Good ones are delicious. Bad ones taste like cardboard and wax." Maybe so, but I'll bet if you took a box of these to your next Christmas party, you'd find yourself a couple of rungs higher on the social ladder. Either that, or people would say, "Hey! It's those colored hamburger things from that website!"

We hope you have enjoyed all the new additions to our site this year. There's still more new features on the way. I imagine that we're going to go massively viral any minute, and just to prove it I'm going to hold my breath when I get through typing this sentence...

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